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Posts tagged ‘nanny advice’

Your child, your caregiver, and the internet: Setting house rules about online safety

By Kristen J. Duca

03-01-18 Manhattan Family Internet article by Kristen

Everywhere you turn, you hear debates surrounding kids and technology usage. Every family has different rules and boundaries relating to technology, but most agree that technology is not going away, and it is best to teach our kids how to navigate it safely early on.

The internet has amazing advantages as it relates to children who explore it in a safe manner. Numerous creative, user-friendly, inexpensive (sometimes FREE!), and unique websites exist for children to gain expertise in certain areas, explore new territories, or further their education in specific subjects. Today’s children can use the internet to do everything from honing their culinary skills to exploring countries across the globe to learning another language to perfecting their math facts.

However, parents are not always around to patrol their child’s usage of technology, and the policing inevitably falls into the hands of caregivers. It is a terrific idea to clearly communicate your expectations surrounding technology in your household upfront to both your caregiver and your child. A few house rules to think about as your child navigates the internet include:

• Do not download attachments or install software without the supervision of an adult.

• Do not agree to meet with people you interact with online.

• If you notice anything online that makes you uncomfortable, bring it to the attention of an adult.

• If someone asks to meet you in person, ignore the request and alert an adult immediately.

• Never give out any personal information or details about yourself, family members, or friends (including name, address, phone numbers, age, school, camp, extracurriculars, teams, photos, or passwords).

• If you use a public computer, make sure you log out of all accounts you accessed during the session.

• Be careful of any screen names you create and make sure these names do not include any of your personal information such as your first or last names.

• Do not compromise other people’s online work or accounts.

• Do not bully, gossip, or post anything inappropriate about anyone online.

• Be mindful of your tone if you post online comments.

• Never post your image or personal video clips online (those of your friends, family members, and acquaintances are off limits as well).

• Beware of minimum age limits on many social media websites and respect them.

• Avoid clicking online ads and pop-up ads, as they can contain viruses or expect you to provide your personal contact information.

• Understand that not everything you read online is true or accurate, and if you are conducting school research online, you should ask an adult (teacher, librarian, or guardian) for respectable websites to use.

• Limit your usage of the internet and be aware that spending time in person with friends or family members is the best way for you to socialize.

• When in doubt, grab an adult for guidance, advice, and supervision.

Whether you print a list of rules and post it to your refrigerator, or create a technology contract signed by all (you, your child, and your caregiver), you will want to be forthcoming about the importance of online safety. Clearly state to your caregiver that your end goal is to make sure your child is protected when he is online under her supervision while you are not present.

You may also want to make it clear to the caregiver that you do not want any personal information or images about your family posted online in any capacity for privacy concerns. Additionally, if your child brings a friend home, you should tell your caregiver that you expect her to relay your house rules regarding technology to him so everyone is on the same page.

Bottom line: it is important that parents and caregivers work together to teach children about safety and responsibility as it relates to technology. Remember, technology will be a big part of our children’s lives for years to come!

Kristen Duca and her husband are the parents of two girls in New York City. She has served as a contributing writer for New York Parenting and Long Island Special Child magazines, and she’s author of “Ultimate Nanny: How to Find, Interview, and Manage the Most Important Person You Will Ever Hire – Your Child’s Nanny,” which is available on amazon.com. She blogs at ultimatemama.com.

Posted 12:00 am, March 3, 2018

03-01-18 Manhattan Family Internet article by Kristen

https://www.nyparenting.com/stories/2018/3/communicating-to-child-caregiver-internet-rules-2018-03.html

Child Care for older children

By Kristen J. Duca

08-2017 Manhattan Family article KD Child Care for Older Children

I am sure you can remember a time in adolescence when you challenged parental authority, thus showing your desire for independence. The age when parents feel comfortable leaving a child alone is quite personal and varies on a family-to-family basis. It not only depends on the maturity level of the child but also on the environment the child is growing up in. However, some parents with older children feel they need the security of a childcare provider to help them during after-school hours. Those parents who work may need a full-time childcare provider to help the child get off to school in a timely manner and to be there for any school closings, holidays, vacations, or schedule changes.

As you analyze your childcare needs for older children, please ask yourself the following questions:

  • Can my child get to school with us or by himself/herself?
  • Would a chaperone be a great asset to our household?
  • What is our family plan for school closures (scheduled holidays and vacations as well as unscheduled snow days, illnesses, or other surprise issues)?
  • Does my child go directly to after-school activities that he or she can walk to, or is a helper needed to get him or her safely from one place to another?
  • Does my child need help or encouragement with completing homework assignments, or is my child self-sufficient?
  • Could my older child benefit from having a buddy or a mentor?

Some parents hire a nanny or sitter for older children just to give their children companionship and themselves piece of mind. Because a caregiver to an older child does not have to be burdened with diaper changes, feedings, or tummy time, parents may want to consider hiring someone the child respects yet can view as a friendly authority figure. Ask any potential childcare candidates if they have experience taking care of older children. Additionally, make sure they are comfortable with taking older children to school and various activities in addition to supervising them in the home.

Parents should clearly define the caregiver’s roles and perhaps even discuss caregiver responsibilities with the older child so that everyone is on the same page. Together, the parent and child could come up with a road map detailing how the caregiver’s hours are spent. This way, the older child feels a sense of independence for acting as a critical member of the caregiver selection process and may not be as resistant to an extra household helper.

Some caregiver’s responsibilities you may want to consider and evaluate when interviewing a caregiver for your older child are listed below:

Homework Help

  • Is the caregiver willing and able to monitor the child’s completion of his/her homework each day/night?
  • Will the caregiver teach the child good homework habits? Here are examples of habits to teach:

1. Completing assignments in a quiet place without distractions like phones or electronic devices

2. Focusing on the task at hand with short study breaks (complete with healthy snacks) when needed

3. Managing stress when solutions do not come easily

  • Can the caregiver review the child’s work for errors or suggestions?
  • Can the caregiver quiz the child for upcoming tests?

After-School Transporting

  • Will the caregiver be able to get the child to and from school and extracurricular activities in a safe and timely manner?
  • Does the caregiver drive?
  • Is the caregiver comfortable using various means of public transportation with your child (buses, trains, subways, ferries, and so on)?
  • Is the caregiver willing to walk with your child to and from school or activities?
  • Does the caregiver know the geographic area you live in well?
  • Can the caregiver follow street directions accurately?
  • Will the caregiver ensure your child gets to his or her destinations safely and on time?

Other Chores

  • While the child is at school or busy with an activity, will the caregiver tackle household chores such as light cleaning, dusting, vacuuming, and laundry?
  • If the child selected some quick, easy, and healthy recipes, would the caregiver be able to make them for lunch or dinner?
  • If you provide the funding, will the caregiver run household errands such as picking up the family’s laundry at the dry cleaners, returning library books, dropping off packages at the post office, selecting birthday gifts, or picking up groceries while the child is not at home?

Creative Activities

  • Does the caregiver have ideas of creative activities to engage the child in when there is a lull in the schedule, including exposing him or her to something new? (Examples include knitting/crocheting, cooking, playing music, making art projects, visiting museums, building models, and so on.)
  • Parents may want to purchase inexpensive and easy craft projects or a craft idea book to keep in the home for the caregiver and child to do together.

Extracurricular Activities

  •  Can the caregiver keep the child off of electronic devices by encouraging him or her to read, play a board or card game, or engage in a healthy physical activity?
  • Will the caregiver engage in sports with the child?

New York-based working mother Kristen Duca and her husband are the parents of two girls. She has worked in the financial services industry for two decades in addition to serving as a contributing writer for New York area publications.  She is the author of “Ultimate Nanny:  How to Find, Interview, and Manage the Most Important Person You Will Ever Hire – Your Child’s Nanny” available on amazon.com now.

08-2017 Manhattan Family article KD Child Care for Older Children

http://www.nyparenting.com/assets/print/manhattan/2017_08_mf.pdf